10.22.2009

Holy Publicity Stunt Batman!


Following the Larry King Live fiasco, Chris Brown’s people got back in the lab to brainstorm another way to spit-shine his tarnished image. This meeting of the minds concluded with the birth of what will surely go down in history as the “Chris Brown Fan Appreciation Tour”. The name alone spawns the debate: does Chris have any fans left? I’d say yes. Now the real question is, will they attend his concert? The verdict is still out on that one. Oh, guess where the tour kicks off. That’s right…Houston friggin’ TX. Chris’ clan says all of the concert’s will be in small venues, to keep the setting “intimate”. This is Swahili for we aren’t sure if people still like dude or if they will come. In an effort not to completely waste our money, your time and Chris’ last ounce of pride, we are going to go ahead and keep this thing compact. I am going to contact his label to let them know my pad is available. I mean, I am sure they won’t need the entire spot, so they can just rent out the living room and kitchen. My first thought was the HOB. But a friend of mine said an establishment like the House of Blues would never allow the likes of Chris Brown in the building. She suggested he try Bar Rio. Perhaps. Maybe he will perform at a nice Knights of Columbus hall.

It will be interesting to see how the radio plays this one. Will they give away tickets to the concert, have him come into the studio, play a Chris Breezy mix the day of the concert - like they do every other artist? Or will they ignore him until he goes away? An appreciation concert will either be the worst idea since Octomom’s reality show or it will be just the thing Chris needs to pull him out of exile. Only time will tell, but I imagine Chris has a uphill battle ahead. Oh, one more question…will he wear a wife beater on stage? *cues rimshot*

I’ve actually forgiven Chris for his misconduct because of his age and the fact that we all fall down. My official stance is that they are both young and it is quite unfortunate that such a private matter had to be played out in such a public forum. We all make mistakes, we all do things we are ashamed of, and we all have the luxury of going through these things in private. I know not everyone will agree. But that’s just my two cents. *flings 2 pennies to the ground*

Let me know if you’re going to attend the concert on November 14. Wear socks…I don’t allow shoes on inside my house!

3 comments:

LaconicIcon said...

LOL, you ill yo. So true about the "intimate" venues. Breezy isn't gonna get past this until he admits that he gave Rihanna the beats. Instead of him and his bowtie dancing around the question, he should sack up and tell the truth. Until then, he'll be playing in jook joints and doing cameos with W-list rappers.

Mocitypretty said...

I know the perfect place he can perform in Alabama. It's called Mike's Do Drop In. It's a classy establishment. You have to wear a shirt and say excuse me when you burp. He will love it.

Anonymous said...

I heart Chris Brown.

Sincerely,

Haute Girl

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