Skinny Jeans < Skinny Genes

I try to make it a habit not to partake in things that do not fit me based on description alone.  i.e. skinny jeans. I'm a lot of things…but frankly, skinny isn’t one of them. Now, I had my skinny day in the sun. But an overcast of about 25 lbs has long since clouded that day. I actually lost about 15 lbs a few years ago and simultaneously found the courage to attempt the skinny jean. After all, if Kate Moss can wear them...*blinks* The skinny jeans experiment went over quite well back then. Subsequently, I found the weight I lost back then (it was hiding in my fridge next to the Ben and Jerry’s) and my one and only pair of skinny jeans now mocks me from the corner of my closet. They think they’re so hot in all their skinny wonder!

I have grown to loathe the skinny jean which appears to have only been created to serve a life sentence as the bane of my existence. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse…The Gap (of all places) decides to go ahead and design…get this…the “really skinny pants”. That’s right folks…skinny is no longer in vogue...apparently really skinny is where all the action is now. Who wants to be really skinny anyway? Really skinny doesn’t have any friends…really skinny isn’t popular or even believable unless you're on a runway in Paris. I say down with really skinny and its stupid pants! It’s high time someone created fat jeans! What about ‘can’t lose this baby weight pants’? Or even Freshmen 15 capris? I know many women who would benefit from the ‘things just aren’t the same trouser’. It’s time for pants to adhere to people’s circumstances!



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